A Monday Mind

It's been difficult for me to get back to the blog. It seems that people are still reading though because someone anonymously left a critical message the other day. Can't please everyone. If you're still reading, thank you for your patience and loyalty!

I am homesick. Dear Chicago, I'll be there as soon as possible, lets say Thanksgiving.

I'm settling into a new job. So far, so good. It's a new challenge and for that, I am grateful.

Football season is upon us! You know this is my favorite time of year. I've been playing fantasy football for eight years with my homeboys, but this just may be the first year I skip our league. I've agreed to play in a free league though. I draft on Sunday.

M.ichael V.ick is back, and D.onovan Mc.Nabb is still my hero. His gesture is a prime example of how black love is way deeper than the mainstream understands.

I want a beautifully landscaped backyard just like the one Kenya McQueen has in the movie Something New.

2009 is flying by, but is has proven to be so much better than my '08.

Vodka Gimlets are my new sip of choice.

I'm still on my "grow out, blow out"; wearing braids at this moment, and I've yet to reach my desired length, but I'm sticking to it. I have my days when I think that a fresh ball player's cut will do just fine, but I always talk myself out of it. I'll post a picture soon.

Speaking of plans, a P.R. certificate is on my roll call, classes begin Sept. 21st, asking for all prayers. Also, have to complete what I started with my R.E. license, pray for me on that too, please. :)

Health care for everyone. Seems like such a sensible concept. Yet, there is so much opposition, people are afraid to share, as if sharing means losing. It's shameful. I am for universal health care. The best way to achieve this? I am not sure. All I know is that I've been on both sides of the coin and while I'm blessed to be amongst the insured right now, I can tell you that sitting in a county hospital's emergency room for basic care is no walk in the park. It sucks, and no one deserves that.

I've been listening to Angela Winbush. Her voice is what's moving me these days.

I need to take my lunch everyday this week. Saves time and money.

I have not been steppin' in a very long time. My fave dance partner reached out to me the other day. If anyone can get me back on the floor, he can.

Yes, I'm still in love with our President and the lovely First Lady.

May God bless us all.

Maven

I'm A B

Recently, I saw a photo of a friend of a friend who was, how should I say this........packin' in her brazier. While her size was amazingly unlike anything I've EVER seen, I must admit I felt a bit envious of "freedom" and obvious confidence in the cards she was dealt.

So I happily declare......I am a B, and dammit, I like 'em! LOL!

Women and men both suffer greatly from image issues, but I am gonna deal with the ladies on this one. Fellas, I'll get at you in a separate post.

As a child and into adolescence, I was teased a great deal for being skinny. In some ways those opinions have never left me, and it manifests itself in my obsession with having a delicious boo-tay. If I had rump like Meagan Goode, Kelly Rowland or Michelle Williams (I chose them because they're tiny), then I would be batting one hundred.

The sad part in all of this, is if I surveyed ten of my friends, all would have one or two things about their bodies, face or hair, that they deemed imperfect.

There is no need to ask how we get to this point. There are endless factors that play a role, but the solution lies within! Embrace yourselves. Embrace it all; the tall, short, skinny, and plump. Claim the soft tresses, ,the weave, the tight coils, the bone straight, the kinks, the natural, the relaxed, and the short and long of it all. Celebrate the curves or the lack thereof. Love your A, B, C, D and double cups; your full or thin lips; your broad or keen nose. Have a big forehead, big feet or a chicken neck? Whatever it is, its all good, because its you!

Also, make it a point to love your sisters, regardless of race or age. We need each others approval and moral support! We must become and remain confident and strong so we're able to pass this stellar self esteem along to our lil' mamas!

Peace and Blessings,

The Maven

A Monday Mind

Football is magic. Pizza is magic. Beer is magic.

I'm catchin' flicks this coming weekend y'all! The Family That Preys, The Women, and Righteous Kill all open on Friday. Can't wait!

Speaking of movies, is Laz Alonzo gonna be a breakout star after his performance in Spike Lee's Miracle at St. Anna? Looks like it to me.....

A.ndrea K.ramer, who was once a poster child for the plain janes has stepped up her fab game once again this season, while my girl P.am O.liver missed her weave chair appointment once again. Damn, I swear she's one of the baddest in the sideline reporting game, but she could use a glam squad (no hate). M.ichelle T.afoya is my girl too. All of them are incredible, actually.

Will eating fresh baked spinach and swiss croissants and having a glass of bubbly every Saturday morning contribute to the increase of my rumpshaker (by the way, that's a good thing for me)? If so, I'm on a roll, 'cuz it has become a weekend ritual. The cute, young, tender French boy who sells the croissants at the Farmer's Market doesn't help either......

So, my cousin and I give Game's CD top billing over Wayne's joint. Besides, I barely understand what Wayne is saying half the time.

This natural hair care is no joke, but DAMN my hair feels good! I'm always lovin' up on my scalp. LOL!

If you have never stepped before, find a class. There is a Steppin' community in most major cities these days. Chicago is sharing! You will love this dance.

Serena Will is that deal! Congrats on the Open victory and welcome back to the number one spot babygirl, you are overwhelmingly deserving.

......as for the opponent Jelena Joke-a-witch, get some tact about yourself. You used your first appearance at a Grand Slam event to make an absolute fool of yourself with your immature antics and poor sportsmanship, during AND after the match. For a minute I thought commentator Mary Carillo was gonna go upside your head with her microphone.

While I'm checking folks for their behavior, I would be completely remiss if I left out Serena's father's.....ummmmmm, lady friend. Her romp on the tennis court after the match was uncalled for and borderline embarrassing. You were not at the Rucker.

I stopped by theybf.com to check out pics from the VMA's red carpet and my question is this......"what's wrong with people?"

When are Squirrel's gonna pull their pants up? I DON"T WANT TO LOOK AT YOUR ASS!!!!

When are Squirrel's gonna take full rows of jewelry out of their mouths? Is that hygienic?

I love the new Swiffer commercials with the "baby come back" mariachi theme. Hilarious.

The gov-ment just took over Freddie and Fannie? Who's next? When will we rebound from all this shht? I feel sorry for our children.........they will look back in history and say we were irresponsible and spineless for allowing the current administration and the, "whichever way the wind blows" media bend us over at will.

Say-Rah Paid-lin is giving ONE damn interview?? Are you kidding me? We're really going for this? WAKE UP!!!!!!!!!! We need to be on her raggedy, lying tail like they were and still are on B. Rocka.

My Auntie Day, back home in The Chi, said she cooked some collard greens yesterday. Now, I want some. But, they take SO long to cook, properly.

F.OX News is scary. I repeat, F.OX News is scary.

I'm trying my hand at an indoor plant. I got an orchid. Cross your fingers.

Does any one watch A.rmy W.ives? Is it good? I need a new show.

What are you reading these days?

ARE YOU REGISTERED TO VOTE?

Maven

P.S. When I use period's within words, it is deliberate and serves a purpose. I'm not crazy. :)

Grow Out Blow Out - Three

Wednesday, the braids came down. Thursday I got a "press 'n curl", for the sole purpose of getting my ends trimmed.

While this growing process is taking awhile, I am rather enjoying the exercise in patience. They say its a virtue, you know.

I am quite pleased with the progress, but I must tell you, I am not a hair person, which is why my short and sexy haircut worked for me. I'm the broad that needs to stay in the salon chair on a very regular basis. For example, Friday, I woke up, unwrapped the hair, and looked like I was wearing a football helmet. I followed instructions. I even slept with the ceiling fan on full blast, so I wouldn't sweat it out. But noooooooo, I still woke up looking like I stuck my finger in a socket. So, Friday, I rocked a ponytail. Go figure.

Yesterday, I succumbed to the shampoo and conditioner, and brought out the trusty Miss Jes.sie's Curly Pud.ding, and did a double strand twist. I love the feel of my natural hair (I'm sure I've said that before) and I will rock my 'fro for a week or two, then head back to the C-O-M-P-T-O-N, to get my braids "re-did".

The Grow Out continues. When will I stop? December '09.

Just in time for the Big 4-0!

Yeah.....that sounds like a plan.

Maven

Hold It Down for Wifey 101

What I really wanted him to say was........"back up off my broad before I bust that ass". This will do, though. (Smiles)

Grow Out Blow Out: Part Deux

Baby, its a heatwave! The weather here in LA has been delightfully scorching, if that makes sense. It's only mid-May, so I'm a bit concerned as to what the summer will hold, but what can a Squirrel Woman do?

One thing I can do is braid this bird's nest back up! LOL! That's right y'all, I am still in the process of growing my hair out. Almost two weeks ago, I took my braids down, and I must say, I am happy with the progress. I've been washing and conditioning my naturalness, and the 'fro is beautiful for a day or two, then it starts to look all "woe is me".

I've held out long enough, especially considering the heat. I don't want to spend my time, indoors, tending my "crop", when I could be out having an afternoon cocktail and a delectable appetizer.

Granted, I don't mind looking like Jesus' sister, all woolen and bronze, but I've got to remedy this, so..........after I catch this Celtics-Cavs Game 7, I'm headed to the braid chair at 3 o'clock. Compton, here I come!

I'll holla at you Squirrels later.

The Maven

In Honor of The Lady

There is a scene in the movie The Joy Luck Club, where the main character, June, tells a story to a little girl about a feather and a mother's good intentions. The story speaks to the core of a mother's love for her child. I've seen this movie countless times, and each time I watch it this scene sticks out as one that touches me deeply. Although I've yet to cross the threshold of motherhood, I am certain that when God's blessing pours upon me in that way, I will be more than ready. I say this so boldly because I have the greatest mother in the world, a shining example of womanhood and humanity.

I call her Ladyjane and here on the blog, I always refer to her as "The Lady". My mother and I have become great friends over the years, which is one of the greatest points in a mother-daughter relationship. She celebrates my victories, gives me a shoulder to cry on when I'm hurt, shares in my secrets, and laughs along with me when I'm in a silly mood. She taught me to accept and love myself in spite of what others had to say. You see, I used to catch the blues as a child. I was a late bloomer in every sense of the phrase. The Lady made sure I knew that it was okay to look like Olive Oyl, have nappy hair, and brown skin.

I want to thank her for her many sacrifices throughout the years. As I become older, I understand the magnitude of those sacrifices more and more. My parents married at a young age, and my mom gave birth to me at a young age. I realize that all the things she allowed and encouraged me to do as I was growing up, are perhaps things she didn't get to experience because I was hanging off her ta ta's. She afforded me dance lessons, AWANA Club, summer camps, road trips, enhanced educational experiences and tools, braces, my first car.....I could go on, but you get the point.

Our mother's want nothing but the best for us, but most of all, I believe, they want us to avoid their pitfalls, mistakes, heartaches, and disappointments. They often wish they could take our places, to shield us from life's harshness. Over the years they fed us, clothed us, disciplined us, educated us, and loved our dirty "draws", all in the hopes that we'd turn out to be respectable and productive.

I'd like to let The Lady know that she prepared me well, I'm proud that she is my mom and I do my best not to embarrass her when I'm out in the streets!

Happy Mother's Day, girl!

The Maven

A Monday Mind

.....it's was rough last week y'all.......

We Wear the Mask

We wear the mask that grins and lies,
It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,—
This debt we pay to human guile;
With torn and bleeding hearts we smile,
And mouth with myriad subtleties.

Why should the world be over-wise,
In counting all our tears and sighs?
Nay, let them only see us, while
We wear the mask.

We smile, but, O great Christ, our cries
To thee from tortured souls arise.
We sing, but oh the clay is vile
Beneath our feet, and long the mile;
But let the world dream otherwise,
We wear the mask!

-Paul Lawrence Dunbar

Pied Piper Pees On Us Again

R. Kelly - Hairbraider [Official Music Video]
by deejoe

Thanks for another hood nursery rhyme, Kellz. Just when I thought we were moving away from dudes wearing braids, you come with this bullshhhht.

The Prototype

I have a friend/Squirrel here in L.A. who swears that modern day women can't hold a stick to Rachel Robinson (just last week Mrs. Robinson was still representing for JRR and he's been gone to glory for thirty-six years) and Nancy Reagan when it comes to holding it down for ones man. "They just don't make 'em like that anymore", he says. He loves that they stood tall through thick and thin and aged gracefully and with dignity throughout it all. In his mind, a woman of that caliber is the ultimate prize, and I believe that he won't be satisfied until he finds his version.


Jackie and Rachel Robinson


Rachel Robinson

From Thomasine and Bushrod to Bonnie and Clyde, tales of women who act as both backbone and kryptonite for their men have always had a special place in my heart. You see, I consider myself to be of the same fabric (wink).

Fictionally and lightheartedly in this category, I think of Weezy (George), Helen (Tom), Claire (Cliff), and Claudine (Roop).

Historically, there was Coretta (Martin) and Betty (Malcolm). Presently, Alma (Colin), fills those shoes. But for me, there exist none better than Ruby Dee (Ossie), she is the quintessential.


Ossie Davis and Ruby Dee


There are contemporaries who perhaps fit the bill, but I don't want to stir up controversy, so I'll leave that alone.

However, Michelle Obama is proving herself to be a shining example. I dig her swag! I appreciate her confidence and sense of self. I admire her love and respect for Barack Obama. Check her handles.....



With a woman like this in his corner, a man stands a better chance.

Your thoughts?

The Monday Mind

What would my life be without a game or match to watch? Long live sports! Go Serena! Go Memphis! I didn't have Memphis going this far in my brackets, but the youngin', D. Rose, from The Crib (that's Chicago) has made me a believer.
Go Lakers! Go White Sox! Will someone please resuscitate The Bulls?

I attended the Lakers-Mavericks game Friday night. Staples Center was rockin'! Lamar Odom is my favorite Laker. He showed up for his team when Dallas had the clamps on KB24. That Dirk had his shot fallin' like raindrops. I didn't understand some of P. Jax's substitutions, but it worked, and it was a good game. There's something about that Zen philosophy....

Why do I impose a bedtime for myself, then F it off by watching the idiot box until my eyes burn. I just can't seem to go to sleep without having watched The Jeffersons.

Family is a blessing. I spent Saturday evening with my baby brother, Sam-U-El. He's been here visiting for a few days, tearing LA up with his homeboys and Cousin Pat. It was great to see them, they've grown into great men. We rolled through Roscoe's and ate ourselves into oblivion. I spent the early part of Sunday with my LA fam, for a christening. Baby Malia slept through most of the ceremony, but she was cute as a button!

Friends are a blessing. I spent the latter part of Sunday with my girl Dan Belle and her daughter, whom I affectionately call "Pippi". I won't tell her mama that Pip is plotting to find her a husband. She whispered this to me, so I'm sworn to secrecy. I thought it was adorable.

I've grown terribly weary of the Clinton campaign. Yes, my side-eye has now turned into a full, eye-rollin', stank azz stare down. On some token, I admire her for not giving up the fight, but I wonder how much more of her truth-stretching, arid humor, and pseudo pulpit swagger must be endured. Damn The Dems! We need a resolution!

Obama '08

The sister from NYC was voted off Oprah's Big Give. I'm sorry Babygirl, but it was time. I'd also grown tired of you looking like a broke down Whitney, each time you opened your mouth to sing. You're a beast about your biz though, polish it off and you can murda the game. Best Wishes.

I miss my Grandmothers.

It's time for me to get my braids redone. Anyone up for a take down party? I make great drinks!

Gas prices aren't gonna go down, are they?

My week is looking busy and bright. Hallelujah!

Fellas, never discount the value of a good edge or lining!

Ladies, trust me, pedicures are your best friend. Get yours today!


The Maven

Where Is The Bottom

Make no mistake. This is a bona fide rant.

I was profiled tonight. Yes, I mean racially. DWB dammit. There are times when I need to clear my head, and on such occasions, I head to the ocean. There is a specific stretch of the ocean in a beach city, three cities south of the one in which I dwell. It is late, and I did not consider the time restrictions along the beaches. They were all closed. My favorite spot, an elevated road parallel to the ocean, has no parking between 10 p.m. and 6 a.m., so obviously I could not pull over and step out my car to allow that fresh ocean breeze to smack me upside my head. I kept driving. I had another destination in mind, another beach spot. Once I arrived, I parked my car, released my frustrations in the form of tears, listened to Joss Stone, wrote myself a letter of affirmation and sat quietly to enjoy some peace.

When I was ready to depart, I had to back out of my space and perform a semi-u-turn in order to face the direction in which I need to go. Lo and behold, I run right into the "beach city" po-po, and this joker pulls me over. Mind you, this particular beach city is not as "liberal" as my own. In typical DWB fashion, I turn on my interior lights, ready my drivers license and proof of insurance, roll down both my front windows and stick my identification out for the officer to see. He gets out of the car, asks me if I know why he pulled me over, and of course I say no, when I really wanted answer "yes, because I'm a pickaninny rolling through your picture perfect town late at night." He proceeds to explain the purpose of the double yellow line which I had no choice but to cross while backing out of my space. He also notices that I had the red face and nose and asked if I was "stable", which almost elicited raucous laughter from me, but because I was in no mood to go the station, I assured him that I was cool, and just came out to get some fresh air to mourn the loss of a loved one. This was a half truth, by the way, yes, there was a death in my family Sunday, but the relative was very distant.

I relay this story to ask, "where is the bottom?" This is the question that was asked by the character Beneatha Younger, in A Raisin In The Sun. While Lorraine Hansberry's play was debuted on Broadway almost fifty years ago, its relevance to the black experience has not changed. I would also venture to say that this timeless story is also, now relevant to a few other minority groups in this world.
I watched tonight's broadcast on ABC. I really enjoyed it. I have read the play and seen the original black and white movie. I have not been fortunate enough yet, to see it on stage.

Back to my rant.

"Where is the bottom", when in 2008, I, as a woman, a woman of color, can get pulled over by the law because I am OF color. Where is the bottom, when Ms. Whoopi Goldberg, with ALL of her accomplishments, contributions and milestones, gets snubbed by the producers of the 80Th Oscar telecast (please see previous post from YBF.com)? Where is the bottom, when Mrs. Ruby Dee, who has blessed us with her grace and dignity in arts and film for over sixty years, has to wait until she is 83 years old to be acknowledged by the Academy of Arts and Sciences? I cry foul. Where is the bottom, when a specific tack head journalist/talk show host can get on national t.v., and speak about lynching in reference to our feature First Lady, Michelle Obama? Where is the bottom, when Phylicia Rashad never received any recognition from her "peers" for being the baddest t.v. mom there ever was. She rocked her roll as Lena Younger last night, a character that reminds us of the humility our fore parents had to possess in order to hold themselves and their families together.

And one more thing..........did anyone see BaBa WaWa (Barb Walters) ask Vanessa Williams if she had ever experienced racism as a child growing up in an all white neighborhood? WTF Babs? It was the late sixties! Vee's answer was yes, and Babs acted surprised. I say, Squirrel please! Hell, she experienced racism when she was crowned Miss America in 1983.

Of course I feel that Sen. Obama is experiencing it, albeit subtle; at least for now.

I could go on and on, but I'm sleepy and certain that I've said enough, if not too much. I just wanna know, where is the bottom? Do you realize that this may never end? Are you mentally tough enough to handle that? No wonder we have hypertension!

This is some fraganackle bull!

Grow Out Blow Out

I love my hair. I really do. Women tend to have a love/hate relationship with their hair. We wish it long, we wish it short. We like ir curly, we like it straight. Braid it, press it. Relax it, color it. TRIM IT! Arrrrgggh! It can be frustrating. I rocked a VERY cute short and fly cut for several years. Think Ms. Nia Long in "The Best Man." Eventually, I decided it was time for CHANGE. (Smiles)

I've been in the process of the "grow out" since last summer, and it is a daunting task. I have three different textures at once, which is not uncommon for a woman of color. The front is thin and soft, the middle and sides are soft and 360 degree curly, and the nape.....let's just say it's tight-fisted! LOL!

Today, my stylist, Brown (that's what I call her) trimmed my hair. The last bit of relaxer that was hanging on at the ends, is gone! I AM COMPETELY NATURAL. There is a weight lifted when you accept yourself just as the Good Lord made ya. It IS what it IS. My hair is healthy, and it feels good. Mind you, I must keep it conditioned and moisturized, but there are no chemicals, and my 'fro is in full effect. I cornrow it at night before bed to give it crinkles and texture by day. It's a tedious process, yet necessary, as I am not interested in rocking a perfectly neat, move no mountain type afro. Mine has to be funky and off-kilter, more on the Christie Love tip, besides, my Cali cousins complement me on it. I must add that my Cali cousins usually give me H-E-Double Hocky Sticks about EVERYTHING (I'm like the sister they never had), so their approval speaks volumes.

I also have an adorable wig that I wear sometimes. For some reason, it is a white boy magnet! LOL!

I will probably have my hair braided again soon. I love individual braids, because they offer a great deal of convenience and freedom. My hair is growing nicely, and the braids, properly maintained, give it a chance to grow without interruption.

There was a woman in the salon today, having her hair done by the owner. She had my dream hair style, and it gave me inspiration to continue with my journey of the "grow out!" I will update you in another six weeks after my next trim. Until then, I will continue to handle my hair with care and love, take my vitamins, and envision myself with that perfect style.

Do you love your 'do?

-The Maven