OhhhKaaaay! Earthquakes are not cute. I grew up with blizzards, and in comparison to an earthquake, I'll take the waste deep snow, bitter cold, and Lake Michigan whup-your-butt wind and chill.
The thing about the 'quake is that it is unpredictable. Its like that slap upside the back of your head from your momma, that you NEVER see coming. My friend here knows that I am a wuss about the 'quake, so he immediately hit me on the BB Messenger to see if I was okay (and to tease me). The cell phone service has been locked up and the news is abuzz with various reactions from citizens and experts alike.
I am not close to the Valley area where the earthquake took place, but I felt it nonetheless. It was also felt in Sin City and San Diego.
This one registered magnitude 5.4 and I am happy that it wasn't worse, but there is always talk of "the big one", and that makes me nervous. I don't wanna get caught with my boy shorts down, ya' know?
There is gonna be a big earthquake drill here in November and I will be there front and center!
I am gonna be about the business of getting a disaster preparedness kit. Water, blanket, radio, batteries, toilet paper, band-aids, canned goods, a good book, etc.
........'cuz you never know.
I'll holla back, The Wendy Williams Show is on.
7.29.2008
7.27.2008
Mishegas
I've spoken before about my affinity for those in their golden years. The following is a prime example of why........
7.25.2008
I See You Jayceon
There is a certain LA boy swagger that you just might not understand unless you live here. This video gives you a taste.
Yummy, right?
(Trav and X, I see you too!)
G, you BLESSED us with this one! Between you and Nasir, I feel rejuved about the Hop.
Yummy, right?
(Trav and X, I see you too!)
G, you BLESSED us with this one! Between you and Nasir, I feel rejuved about the Hop.
7.23.2008
Get Better, Baby
In case you didn't know, within the pecking order of male dominated sports, football, for me, is tops. Basketball tightly closes in at second, and that beautiful, peaceful and relaxing game of baseball pulls up the rear.
With The Football League commencing its player-dreaded camps this week, some things stood out in my mind.
1) Young Chad is gonna be happy that he stayed in The Natti. I have a feeling that this is their year. Raymond James Stadium or BUST.
2) Damn, if J.ason Taylor doesn't look good in that Skins uni.
3) Donnie Mac is back! That NFC East is gonna be a beast!
4) Hurry up and get better. Antoni.o "The Smile" Gates is going to finally be back in action from that horrible turf toe injury, to be available for my Fantasy team, and also, to make my day when the corners of his mouth rise to display those amazing pearly whites!
In case you didn't know......put your damn shades on, its gonna get bright!
God Bless America!
With The Football League commencing its player-dreaded camps this week, some things stood out in my mind.
1) Young Chad is gonna be happy that he stayed in The Natti. I have a feeling that this is their year. Raymond James Stadium or BUST.
2) Damn, if J.ason Taylor doesn't look good in that Skins uni.
3) Donnie Mac is back! That NFC East is gonna be a beast!
4) Hurry up and get better. Antoni.o "The Smile" Gates is going to finally be back in action from that horrible turf toe injury, to be available for my Fantasy team, and also, to make my day when the corners of his mouth rise to display those amazing pearly whites!
In case you didn't know......put your damn shades on, its gonna get bright!
God Bless America!
7.22.2008
The Tale of Sexy Potbelly
The great thing about a house party is you never know what to expect. Starting with the host can be a great litmus test, but that is not always a telltale sign of the vibe.
I attended a backyard get down this past weekend that I shall never forget as long as I live.
I was rolling with my girl Dan Belle (of course), who, by the way, now goes by "Big Ticket" (I'll get into that later). We were accompanied a friend, whom we will call Flight Wings, for the purpose of this story. I should note that the night began with a crew of five, but quickly dwindled down to three after some parental responsibilities took precedence for one and some CRAAAZZZY, Starsky and Hutch tire screeching, kidnapping, relationship drama took place for another (I swear I can't make this shht up).
Moving on, my com padres and I headed off on a small journey about an hour outside of LA. We arrived at the lovely home of one of Dan Belle's colleagues and that's when the madness began. Barring the absolutely INSANE comments made to Flight Wings about his personal involvement with Dan Belle by some folks he'd just met, the evening proved to be quite entertaining; a smorgasbord of blog fodder under the dark starry skies.
When we arrived, the hostess was on the mike singing along with MJB's "Just Fine". She really has a decent voice, so it was funny to see, but in a good way. We said our hello's and bum rushed the bartender, and basically sat right there for the rest of the night. There was food, so we smashed the buffet, then settled in for some people watching. Dan Belle was socializing with her folks, so that left Flight Wings and I to take in the fun that was happening on the dance floor.
While there was plenty of rumpshaking, droppin' it like its hot, and line dancing, the apple of my GTFOH eye, was a guy I dubbed, Sexy Potbelly. This cat was INCREDIBLE. Think, a broke down T. Howard, or Hustle and Flow's D Jay. Homie danced all night, and he had chicks lined up to dance with him, literally waiting for him to bend them over and simulate backshots to the beat of the music. He danced to every song, regardless of genre, like he was a male exotic dancer, with the hokey snake moves and all. I say this because, it wasn't appealing, at least not to me. He wore gray sweatpants and and a dingy wifebeater, and although he wasn't a big dude, he had a little potbelly and it was all too stank and funny.
I was tempted to go over and dance with him for the private amusement of myself, Dan Belle and Flight Wings, but I was afraid of what he might smell like, 'cuz like I said, he was dancing all night, and consistently sweaty, although that didn't seem to matter to the broads who STILL couldn't get enough. Well, Sexy Potbelly's shining moment came when he left the dance floor and headed to the buffet. This Squirrel opened two chafing dishes and went right in with his bare, nasty, sweaty, booty and crotch grabbing hands, and picked out a rib and a hot link and devoured them as if it were the last supper!!!!!! Flight Wings and I sat there in stunned silence for a spilt second before we erupted in laughter. It happened so fast, but it felt like slow motion. That's why I don't like to get down at a buffet, and had we seen that when we arrived, we would have never indulged. At the time, Dan Belle had just gotten a plate of veggies, so we opted not to tell her about the food dive until we left. To top it all off, Sexy Potbelly took his soft shoes right back to the dance floor, greasy bar-b-que hands and all and resumed his stripper boogie with a big girl.
Our next source of laughter came from a Huxtable sweater-wearing, toothless semi-old timer who came to the bar and asked for Gin and Juice......."Did he just say Gin and Juice"? (Crickets).... The answer to that question was a resounding yes, and the Squirrel was dead serious. He successfully put the icing on the cake with that request.
It was time to go.
So we left.
But I have a word of advice to you all. If you ever meet a friends love interest for the first time, DON'T take it upon yourself to divulge info about your friend and make comments that might be embarrassing or hurtful to the friend or their date. A woman, who by the way, told us that her people call her Aunt Juicy (seriously), told Flight Wings that she hoped he had some loot because Dan Belle was a Big Ticket. It was classless and egregious and she should have known better; the Itch gave GAW everywhere a bad name. I was through then, and I'm through now.
The Maven.
I attended a backyard get down this past weekend that I shall never forget as long as I live.
I was rolling with my girl Dan Belle (of course), who, by the way, now goes by "Big Ticket" (I'll get into that later). We were accompanied a friend, whom we will call Flight Wings, for the purpose of this story. I should note that the night began with a crew of five, but quickly dwindled down to three after some parental responsibilities took precedence for one and some CRAAAZZZY, Starsky and Hutch tire screeching, kidnapping, relationship drama took place for another (I swear I can't make this shht up).
Moving on, my com padres and I headed off on a small journey about an hour outside of LA. We arrived at the lovely home of one of Dan Belle's colleagues and that's when the madness began. Barring the absolutely INSANE comments made to Flight Wings about his personal involvement with Dan Belle by some folks he'd just met, the evening proved to be quite entertaining; a smorgasbord of blog fodder under the dark starry skies.
When we arrived, the hostess was on the mike singing along with MJB's "Just Fine". She really has a decent voice, so it was funny to see, but in a good way. We said our hello's and bum rushed the bartender, and basically sat right there for the rest of the night. There was food, so we smashed the buffet, then settled in for some people watching. Dan Belle was socializing with her folks, so that left Flight Wings and I to take in the fun that was happening on the dance floor.
While there was plenty of rumpshaking, droppin' it like its hot, and line dancing, the apple of my GTFOH eye, was a guy I dubbed, Sexy Potbelly. This cat was INCREDIBLE. Think, a broke down T. Howard, or Hustle and Flow's D Jay. Homie danced all night, and he had chicks lined up to dance with him, literally waiting for him to bend them over and simulate backshots to the beat of the music. He danced to every song, regardless of genre, like he was a male exotic dancer, with the hokey snake moves and all. I say this because, it wasn't appealing, at least not to me. He wore gray sweatpants and and a dingy wifebeater, and although he wasn't a big dude, he had a little potbelly and it was all too stank and funny.
I was tempted to go over and dance with him for the private amusement of myself, Dan Belle and Flight Wings, but I was afraid of what he might smell like, 'cuz like I said, he was dancing all night, and consistently sweaty, although that didn't seem to matter to the broads who STILL couldn't get enough. Well, Sexy Potbelly's shining moment came when he left the dance floor and headed to the buffet. This Squirrel opened two chafing dishes and went right in with his bare, nasty, sweaty, booty and crotch grabbing hands, and picked out a rib and a hot link and devoured them as if it were the last supper!!!!!! Flight Wings and I sat there in stunned silence for a spilt second before we erupted in laughter. It happened so fast, but it felt like slow motion. That's why I don't like to get down at a buffet, and had we seen that when we arrived, we would have never indulged. At the time, Dan Belle had just gotten a plate of veggies, so we opted not to tell her about the food dive until we left. To top it all off, Sexy Potbelly took his soft shoes right back to the dance floor, greasy bar-b-que hands and all and resumed his stripper boogie with a big girl.
Our next source of laughter came from a Huxtable sweater-wearing, toothless semi-old timer who came to the bar and asked for Gin and Juice......."Did he just say Gin and Juice"? (Crickets).... The answer to that question was a resounding yes, and the Squirrel was dead serious. He successfully put the icing on the cake with that request.
It was time to go.
So we left.
But I have a word of advice to you all. If you ever meet a friends love interest for the first time, DON'T take it upon yourself to divulge info about your friend and make comments that might be embarrassing or hurtful to the friend or their date. A woman, who by the way, told us that her people call her Aunt Juicy (seriously), told Flight Wings that she hoped he had some loot because Dan Belle was a Big Ticket. It was classless and egregious and she should have known better; the Itch gave GAW everywhere a bad name. I was through then, and I'm through now.
The Maven.
7.20.2008
Those Annual Sports Awards 2008
I think the most memorable moment of the night for me was at the end of the show when the camera went to a shot of D Fish after Jesus Shuttlesworth slyly remarked "another win in LA", as the C's accepted their award for Best Team. Fish looked like he was gonna meet Mr. Allen in the green room and lay hands on him. There was clearly an elephant in the room at that moment, certain to be dealt with next season in a three-point barrage by Fish against the C's. Might not work though, seeing how Sugar Ray has the sweetest stroke and counter-attack in all the NBA. Look up the art of shooting baskets and you're very likely to see his smiling face.
Another momemt of note was the look on young Eli's wife's face when the so-called host was clowning her man about winning the Bowl and coming out of his brother's shadow. Embarrassing.
Overall, the show was decent. I am not a Timberfake fan, so that made it just a bit unbearable to watch, besides, his constant references to Memphis and Kansas were annoying. Get over it already, will ya?
It was great to see Kevin Everett walk on stage to accept his Jimmie V award, God is good all the time! It was also wonderful to see Ms. Robin Roberts and the Chicago homie Stu Scott there present the award. They are both brave and amazing in their own accomplishments and respective battles with cancer.
The honoring of Tommie Smith and John Carlos with the Arthur Ashe Courage Award was a proud moment indeed, as they seem to have put behind them, a few disagreements and hard feelings that have tainted their legacy over the years. It is likely that we shall never again see a black fist raised in a display of solidarity and black power, ever again. I feel an ESSPIN original movie coming.....
As for the "fits", everyone looked fairly nice. A man in a well-tailored suit NEVER gets old. Adrian Peterson looked VERY nice. Thumbs up to my girl Q, for her styling prowess with Mr. Whitaker and the Lady Baller, Ms. Parker.
The Maven
Another momemt of note was the look on young Eli's wife's face when the so-called host was clowning her man about winning the Bowl and coming out of his brother's shadow. Embarrassing.
Overall, the show was decent. I am not a Timberfake fan, so that made it just a bit unbearable to watch, besides, his constant references to Memphis and Kansas were annoying. Get over it already, will ya?
It was great to see Kevin Everett walk on stage to accept his Jimmie V award, God is good all the time! It was also wonderful to see Ms. Robin Roberts and the Chicago homie Stu Scott there present the award. They are both brave and amazing in their own accomplishments and respective battles with cancer.
The honoring of Tommie Smith and John Carlos with the Arthur Ashe Courage Award was a proud moment indeed, as they seem to have put behind them, a few disagreements and hard feelings that have tainted their legacy over the years. It is likely that we shall never again see a black fist raised in a display of solidarity and black power, ever again. I feel an ESSPIN original movie coming.....
As for the "fits", everyone looked fairly nice. A man in a well-tailored suit NEVER gets old. Adrian Peterson looked VERY nice. Thumbs up to my girl Q, for her styling prowess with Mr. Whitaker and the Lady Baller, Ms. Parker.
The Maven
7.15.2008
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